I spent the last three days forming this blog post in my mind, and when it came time to putting pen to paper, or fingers to the keyboard, I don't know what to say. I don't exactly know how to describe the experiences I've had this week, but I do know that it is overwhelming. For those of you who don't know what I've been up to, I left Sunday for a mission trip in Washington DC, not knowing anything besides the fact that we would be working with children and with the elderly. I came willing to serve, to show the face of Jesus to whoever we met. We worked at a daycare/with a babysitter, playing with the most amazing group of kids. Their smiles, coming from kids who didn't care about what kind of shoes they had on their feet, whether or not they had the newest iPhone, meant the world to me. They were so thankful to have someone to sit next to them and help them with their homework, to help them figure out that hard problem, just to be a friend. It was harder to leave them than anything else. Two days ago, we were told that we would be doing something unusual, that we would need to get out of our comfort zone. Yesterday, when we woke up, we were told that we would be feeding the homeless on two dollars. We were given a set of directions to our destination, two dollars, and questions to ask the homeless that we came into contact with. We weren't allowed to carry any money, a phone, or a watch, and the goal was to experience how being homeless felt. Three friends and I went into Subway, Panera, and Krispy Kreme, and asked for donations- either money or food. The first two said they already donated a lot to homeless and non-profit organizations, Krispy Kreme gave us an extra dozen donuts. We distributed the donuts in two different places, and experienced what homelessness kind of felt like, only for three hours instead of a lifetime. After this week, and seeing how broken the city truly is, all I can say is that I'm overwhelmed, much like the song at the bottom of this post describes. I'm overwhelmed by what God is doing, and how he is working in the city. I am disappointed, however, that in a place that has so much wealth and power, and so many important people, they aren't doing anything to help these people. These people who are constantly on drugs, drinking alcohol, and mistaking themselves for federal agents because of mental disability. It really is overwhelming, but I can see the good in all of it. The guys we met are so thankful for what they have, and they still trust in God, when I would have given up hope a long time ago, that he isn't done working in their lives. There is still so much more that could be done. It made me not want to go back, and sit in a school building for seven hours a day, five days a week, when there is so much I could be doing in DC, so many lives I could be impacting. I will go back there, who knows when, and show God's face to so many more people less fortunate than I am, and remind me once again of how much I have and how thankful I am for it.
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We all have the days where we think life can't get any worse. We also have the days when we think life can't get any better- I know what both of them feel like. For a little bit, you feel like you're soaring high above the clouds, and nothing can bring you down. Then, it does. You come crashing down to Earth, leaving behind so many things. In the past couple of weeks, I've had more bad days than I could count. Everything seems to be going great- I'm soaring above the clouds, and then everything comes crashing down around me- everything that I had worked so hard to build up and to make stable.
The point of my blog is to intertwine some Christian elements into our daily lives. So, I'm here to tell you that it does get better. You will soar high above the clouds again. But, for right now, I use the Bible as my strength. The one verse that I have heard so many times, Phillipians 4:13 says, "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength." That verse is what keeps me going- those 6 o'clock mornings when I don't want to do anything other than go back to sleep, Thursday night when I still have three hours of homework and all I want to do is crawl into bed, before soccer practice when I don't think I have the energy to kick a soccer ball. That's when I remember Phillipians 4:13. And somehow, I make it through. I always do. You will too. |
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