while I reflected on my experiences at highland retreat (scroll down to see that post), the saying "He never gives us more than we can handle" made its way into my mind. i thought about that phrase for a good week before it made any sense. because, so often we think that the bad things that are happening can't get any worse. our day that is already the worst day in the world can't possibly get worse. but then it does. we learn things from that day and experiences that we never thought we could.
while i was at highland, i had a mild panic attack. i didn't think that i could handle what was happening around me, and i panicked. as i sat there, at the worst point in the two weeks, i thought it couldn't get any worse. and even though it didn't, i knew that there would be worse. maybe not that camp season, maybe not in the next year. in the bad experiences, you have to be able to see the good. the silver lining as people say. we're all human, so we will have bad days. and we will have days where we feel like we're floating on top of the world. but just remember the silver lining. the best (and the worst) are still yet to come.
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four months ago, I sat down at my computer to fulfill a thought that had been tugging at the back of my mind. I loved kids, music, and camp, so that night, I sent in an application to be a part of the staff-in-training program at highland retreat. even though two weeks seemed like eternity, and my heart pounded at the thought of going away for any longer than a week, I knew it would be an amazing experience for me and would help solidify plans for the future.
one month later, I was accepted into the staff-in-training program, and the process of paperwork and background checks ensued. my anxiety eased, even though the thought of leaving my bed and minimal bug environment still tugged at the back of my mind. two weeks ago, my bags were packed and loaded into the car for the biggest adventure of my life. highland quickly welcomed me with open arms, and I became part of the "family". the other sit members quickly became my closest friends during those two weeks, even extending to the point where we tolerated each other until three in the morning (more details to follow). we were quickly submerged into the leadership roles, where we volunteered our time in the kitchen, setting up worship services, and leading games and activities for the campers. sleep was quickly welcomed, as my friends and I stayed up way past our bedtime catching mice and frogs, and drying shoes after the rains that came through. however, those memories were some of my favorites, and I wouldn't have changed a thing. we learned new songs and new instruments, and practiced on ones learned in previous years. banjo and ukulele included. however, I knew the time was drawing to an end. ready to leave, though I was, I wasn't ready to leave behind the friends and the new experiences highland brought to me. so, highland, thank you for becoming my home for the past two weeks. though the bugs were plentiful, so were the memories and laughs. I hope to see you again next year. |
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April 2018
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